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It depends....

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first entry in over one year [Mar. 15th, 2008|08:31 pm]
It depends....
[Current Location |my apartment]
[Current Mood |drunkdrunk]
[Current Music |Danielle playing our piano]

If this doesn't sound coherent or if my grammar is worse than that of a 5 year old, it's because I'm drunk *giggles*
Holy fucking shit. I'm using LJ. Maybe I've just gotten sick of being a hermit. Who the fuck knows? I sure as hell don't. So what has been going on in my life? I finally went back to R-MWC and graduated with degree with which I intend to do nothing, so it seems kind of pointless. To tell you the truth, I've been contemplating going back to school for something that I would actually enjoy. As I see it, there are two options: Nursing (I could make good money doing that) or forensics (I'm not so sure about the money, but at least it would be stimulating.). The only drawback regarding going back to school is the fact that I wouldn't have time to do the things that I enjoy.

I've recently started skateboarding (for real). I'm not that great and probably never will be, but it makes me feel so happy and free. I can drop in on a half-pipe and pretty much ride any ramp (not such an accomplishment considering I see ankle biters doing back side tailslides down rails that surpass them in height). I would really love to kill at street, but let's face it...I can't jump very high, and you can generally only ollie as high as you can jump. This makes me think that vert is going to be where I excel...even if no one cares about it. Enough about skating....

In terms of my personal life, Danielle and I have celebrated our three year anniversary. It really doesn't feel like it's been three years, but time seems to fly the older I get. I'm more in love with her than ever. I'm not saying that we don't have our issues, but I know that she is the one. Most of our problems have to do with the fact that I project a lot of my insecurities. The biggest issue is the fact that I cannot accept the fact that I am bisexual. I can't really say that I have ever been involved with a decent guy. Furthermore, I have my fair share of trauma because of certain experiences with them. Needless to say, when she realized that she likes some guys (a very select few), I grew very insecure. Mainly because I felt the same way. I hated it. It was, and still is, difficult for me to accept after what I have experienced. It was ( and sometimes still is) pretty rough for awhile because I was taking my own self-disgust out on her. Yeah....maybe it's pathetic. Nonetheless, she understands now that I am finally talking about it. She actually knew the truth about me before I could admit it to myself. Isn't it ironic how that works?

My job is...well, it's a job. I work in the billing department of an insurance company. It's definitely not something that I want to do forever. It's a great company...but I hate billing. If I don't go back to school for nursing or forensics I'm probably going to go into underwriting or actuarial analysis.

Well, kiddies, It's time for me to go right now. If anyone still reads this, let me know.
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Comments:
From: notpiecebypiece
2008-03-16 01:10 am (UTC)
I don't think that's pathetic. for whatever it's worth even though you don;t know me at all, you and D seem to be really good together, and that's so rare, and I think it's great. xo.
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[User Picture]From: indigodaisy
2008-03-16 03:35 am (UTC)
hi ::waves:: I saw your message on myspace in the past week as I was getting back into the site. I'm glad to hear you are well.
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[User Picture]From: artificialworld
2008-03-16 04:17 am (UTC)
>>The only drawback regarding going back to school is the fact that I wouldn't have time to do the things that I enjoy.

...annnd speaking from experience, if you're working while doing the school thing, you don't have time for much of anything, enjoyable or no. ;)

3 years. wow. Congratulations to both of you. And it's awesome that you're skating! Who cares if you aren't the best at it -- Loving it is what matters. I still think the happiest I've ever been was when I was in gymnastics. Funny how sports can be like that.

Sounds like life is treating you well. Now don't make all of us in LJ-land have to wait till 2009 for your next update :P
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[User Picture]From: dunklesengel007
2008-03-17 04:14 pm (UTC)
yeah....do you ever have any free time? Are you still at the job where you interned? The only thing about not being that good at skating is that it hurts a lot. You should see my hips...bruised and swollen. I always fall on my hips. I can't really hit the skatepark for a while because I partially tore the ligaments along the top of my foot and sprained my ankle. Ironically, this did not happen skating. It happenend walking -_-
I went to the skatepark yesterday and really aggravated it when I lost my footing, so I'm just gonna not skate on it until it's better.
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[User Picture]From: goblin_defender
2008-03-16 11:44 pm (UTC)
it's good to hear from you! :D sometimes i start wondering how people have been doing but we all get caught up in our lives. which is good because i think having hobbies and friends is more important that being a computer hermit. (sorry i'm rambling)

skating!? wow. i definately don't have the coordination or bravery to do that. i think the most i've ever skated was probably two feet on a flat surface. haha. good luck and have fun!!:D

i think that both things that you want to go back to school for are pretty interesting. my mother's a nurse and she has some very interesting stories. but she likes the job a lot and finds it really rewarding.

congrats on your 3 years together. i'm glad that you've been so happy!!

hope to hear about you again soon!

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[User Picture]From: dunklesengel007
2008-03-17 04:02 pm (UTC)
How have you been? Are you still in Japan? What kind of nurse is your mom? I'm not sure what kind of nursing I would pursue. Working in a doctor's office would be stable but boring. I'm actually really interested in cardio-thoracic (surgical nursing). Of course, I don't know if there are any surgical nursing programs at the local school. Emory is just too expensive, and I'm not sure that I want to deal with student loans.
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[User Picture]From: behindthec
2008-03-20 11:12 pm (UTC)
i love you.
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